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A Comedian’s Guide to Making Hanukkah Gelt

Eliot Glazer’s golden-dusted chocolate confections actually look pretty good

by
Stephanie Butnick
December 17, 2014
Eliot Glazer making chocolate gelt on the web series Munchies. (Vice)
Eliot Glazer making chocolate gelt on the web series Munchies. (Vice)

Vice’s Munchies video series has some occasional gems, and the first installation of their Hanukkah Spectacular! is one of them. I mean that literally: the video features comedian Eliot Glazer making gold-painted chocolate gelt, the truest Hanukkah gem of all.

“I’m definitely one of these people who says, ‘I’m a cultural Jew, I identify culturally,’” Glazer, who’s the brother of Broad City star Ilana Glazer, admits, “which basically just means I’m Jewish for the food.”

Still, he makes some good gelt—and shows how easy it is to ditch the ubiquitous netted bags of aluminum-wrapped chocolate and DIY the Hanukkah treat instead. He’s not the only one moving away from the stale, store-bought variety. Last year Marjorie Ingall highlighted several new gelt purveyors hawking innovative offerings that not only promote fair trade and ethical manufacturing but look pretty and taste delicious. (I may be biased; that’s me reaching for a handful of glam coins in the picture.)

But Glazer’s gelt-making, which involves a fair amount of cursing and Hanukkah wishes for Golden Girls marathons, is way more fun. As he not-so-delicately paints his chocolate creations with edible gold dust, he explains, “When it comes to painting, just kind of think of yourself as Bob Ross, but with a bigger afro, because you’re Jewish today.”

His golden gelt complete, Glazer leaves us with these final word of wisdom: “Don’t eat too much or you’ll get diarrhea.” Dayenu.

Stephanie Butnick is chief strategy officer of Tablet Magazine, co-founder of Tablet Studios, and a host of the Unorthodox podcast.