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This Is a Picture of the World’s Biggest Matzah

Manischewitz opens new corporate HQ in Newark

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The giant matzah.(SouthWard)

It’s 25 feet long and three-and-a-half feet wide: The size of 336 ordinary matzahs. It was made on the occasion of the groundbreaking yesterday of Manischewitz’s new corporate headquarters in Newark, New jersey. “The word ‘Manischewitz’ is like two words: money and sweat,” said Yona Metzger, Israel’s chief Ashkenazic rabbi, who was on hand. “So, if you want to do money, you have to sweat. They sweat a lot and they did it.” Is there a more succinct articulation of the Jewish ethos?

Also present was Newark Mayor Cory Booker, who described Newark and the kosher food behemoth as “a great matchmaking.” For those unaware, Booker may well be Newark’s second-most-famous Jew, despite not, technically, being Jewish. As a Rhodes scholar, he was president of Oxford’s Jewish student group; at Yale, he helped found Eliezer, a semi-secret, explicitly Jewish society.

Not pictured: Six tons of charosets and horseradish, and four months of constipation.

Manischewitz Opens Company Headquarters in Newark [SouthWard]
Earlier: Skullcaps and Bones

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And just where do these geniuses propose hiding the afikomen? Eh? Eh?


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This Is a Picture of the World’s Biggest Matzah

Manischewitz opens new corporate HQ in Newark

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