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Adam Levine Continues to Ruin Everything

America has every right to be mad at the Maroon 5 lead singer

by
Adam Chandler
May 29, 2013
(Getty)
(Getty)

It’s a modern boy’s dream to use the access that internet provides to celebrities to make ill-conceived dreams come true. Take little Jake Davidson’s dream of having supermodel Kate Upton be his date to the Milken Community High School senior prom. Davidson made a YouTube video of his plea, which was viewed nearly three million times, after which Upton responded via Twitter with a very soft maybe.

Upton didn’t go, citing a busy schedule or something, but Davidson pulled off quite a coup when fellow supermodel Nina Agdal went as Davidson’s date in Upton’s stead.

“Jake was waiting to hear from Kate and when Nina heard about it, she said ‘If Kate can’t go, I’d like to go’ because she never got to go to her prom,” explained Jake’s mother Cheryl.

What does this have to do with Maroon 5 singer Adam Levine? Levine crushed his fellow tribesman’s dream by swooping in. Levine, who’d just split from his supermodel girlfriend Behati Prinsloo, reportedly got serious with Agdal before her corsage from Davidson had even dried out.

I know some might say we should have no pity for Davidson. But I picture poor Jake as I picture Moses on Mt. Nebo, watching plaintively as his brother Aaron (also a Levite) crossed into the Promised Land (of the heart).

Making matters worse, US Weekly, which never makes mountains out of molehills, is reporting that today Levine is apologizing for muttering “I hate this country” after Levine’s proteges Judith Hill and Sarah Simmons were voted off the competition show The Voice after failing to garner enough viewer votes.

“I obviously love my country very much and my comments last night were made purely out of frustration,” Levine explained to Us Weekly on Wednesday in response to the public outcry. Some Twitter followers called out Levine’s slam as unpatriotic, insensitive and uncalled for; the singer initially responded via Twitter by defining the terms “joke,” “humorless,” “lighthearted” and “misunderstand.” Others agreed with Levine’s outrage over the elimination results.

The feeling isn’t mutual.

Adam Chandler was previously a staff writer at Tablet. His work has appeared in the New York Times, the Wall Street Journal, the Atlantic, Slate, Esquire, New York, and elsewhere. He tweets @allmychandler.